The Matterhorn

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Life of The Dust Bunny

ORIGINAL HUMOR

An epic documentary of never before seen footage of the Dust Bunny in its natural environment.  Sweeping panoramic shots of expansive wooden plains being traversed by herds of these gentle, magnificent creatures.  A great male voice with a British accent narrates the piece, illustrating the mating rituals, migratory patterns, seasonal cycle and dangers facing the Dust Bunny. There is a great musical score, especially when the male Dust Bunny dances for the female’s attention.  Also very dramatic music charges the vacuum cleaner scene, in which a baby Dust Bunny falls prey while its parents are helpless to intervene but must suffer the loss to ensure they live to reproduce again.  There are wonderfully spacey shots of dust particles dancing in a ray of sunlight through a window, with narrative explaining how these particles would one day join each other to form the Dust Bunnies of tomorrow. This of course after the baby killing scene, as the vacuum unwittingly kicks up these tiny particles, thus contributing to the never ending circle of Dust Bunny life.  

Inky Shadows

ORIGINAL HUMOR

Deep in the bottom of the ocean there exists a place inhabited by adorable little baby octopuses who debate deeply philosophical, social and political ideology while devouring fish and other sea creatures indiscriminately in their constant search for food and fulfillment. Their names are Blinky (the remedial one), Stinky (the hippie), Winky (the con artist), Kinky (the transgender sex freak), Pinky (the debutante/princess), Dinky (the rich one), Thinky (the nerd), Drinky (the alcoholic/drug addict), Slinky (the coward), Shrinky (the overcompensating “bro” jock), Linky (the paranoid conspiracy theorist), Sinky (the hypochondriac), Plinky (the musician), Clinky (the cop), and Twinky (the gluttonous octo-baby Mayor of Inky Shadows) This of course is an animation, very cute and at the same time very dark. 

Sukki Sushi

ORIGINAL HUMOR

Sukki (pronounced suck-ee) Sushi

Imagine the cheesy and totally unauthentic McMuhricanized “Aussie” marketing of Outback steakhouse – brought to Japanese cuisine.  This restaurant commercial is narrated by a syrupy, totally sexual Caucasian female voice (think a casino or Las Vegas commercial on the radio) and the script is laden with lines like: “mom will beg like a geisha girl for dad’s thick spicy bamboo roll”  and “the kids will flip for our ancient ninja soup- tiny pasta throwing stars shrouded in darkness by a soy bean curd broth” and of course “After hours, sharpen your katana at our Ronin’s Den sake bar and dance party.”  

This sketch of course includes a typical white TV commercial family acting overly impressed and excited about what amounts to another corporate chain restaurant exploiting a culture for profit.

The Lone Ranger and Tonto in Corporate America

ORIGINAL HUMOR

The Lone Ranger has been busy over the last few decades building a multi-million dollar cattle and railroad securities firm.  Tonto has been an outstanding employee for many years, but over time his methods and tools/weapons have become outdated and he needs to adjust to the ever-changing modern world of security threats.  

The Lone Ranger keeps putting Tonto on Performance Improvement Plans but Tonto repeatedly (perhaps over the course of few sketches) manages to not only save his job but make the Lone Ranger look like an asshole/idiot. An office environment will be needed for this sketch, as well as auxiliary characters. The Lone Ranger’s over-eager Japanese secretary/personal assistant is extremely excited to be working for one of his American heroes who he compares to John Wayne, much to the chagrin of the less popular and more PC Lone Ranger. Tonto plays up the fact that John Wayne was less forward thinking than the Lone Ranger because he knows it irritates and embarrasses him. You see, the Lone Ranger is not an evil man, he’s just a greedy capitalist who only uses pure silver bullets and spends a lot on fancy handkerchiefs. 

This is my tribute to Sherman Alexie. I loved The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven (and Smoke Signals) and I want to pay homage to him by creating a sketch involving Native American relations with white men in the corporate environment in a way that shows the lack of efficiency in modern bureaucracy and technology. I also aim to poke fun at the lack of soul and compassion in the stereotypical corporation.   

Silver Linings

ORIGINAL HUMOR

Silver Linings is the heartwarming yet side splitting tale of a retirement home and its staff, residents and their family visitors.  There’s the elderly female porn star who often mistakes staff or other residents for past co stars and sometimes thinks she’s on the set of an adult film.  There’s the retired “Jack Bauer” character for whom even a trip to the bathroom is a matter of national security.  The Director of the Silver Linings facility is reminiscent of a John Cleese character from Fawlty Towers: always stressing out each episode because of some important guest he wants to impress.  Invariably, the staff and residents betray his efforts by simply being their hilarious selves.  

This is my hilarious social commentary about the less than stellar way American culture views and treats senior citizens.  This would be portrayed by lackluster family members, apathetic/unskilled staff and ridiculous rules imposed by the huge, faceless corporate parent company, Happy Endings Inc. They also own and operate the popular Sunset Cruise lines.

Are You My Friend?

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